going thru it all..

I don't wish to put on a face thru it all,
and tell them its a-o-kay..
when its not,
but I've my reasons..

pls understand I can only share wat I've accept in my life..
and there're so much more for me to accept
before I can live thru it and share..

I don't care if its 'bout my broken heart, nor my crumbling health,
those however true,
I can't stop you from speculating...
but pls let me atleast retain some dignity ..

I care for ppl that don't want me in their life, or have to fit me into their schedules..
yes, but even if u misunderstand my intentions,
its alright for me;
becoz I choose to believe in u; to understand and to be there ...

sometimes, I feel like a attention-whore,
telling/replying ppl things even though I hate to elobrate,
but maybe becoz just as much as there's part of me tat wants to be private;
i too need ppl to be with me; alias the "tension of the extreme opposites.."

but these I know, from the bottom of my heart,
I just don't wish to go off queitly in the night,
becoz even if the journey ends today, may someone think of me with a smile,
becoz I strongly believe that's y I'm here for,
to serve another person, to make his/her day better,

I know I'm not the whole world,
and I'm so relieved that most ppl will never need me again;
so execuse me, if I disappear again,
becoz I truly wish to be with u all...but life isn't abt getting all the dreams fulfilled..

thank you for sharing your life,
with me;
yes, the broken bread and poured out wine is my purpose in life,
remember me with a cheer..
with good voice and happiness..
that's how i wanna go..