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in a class of its own.

Have u ever felt left out, or left behind.
Felt that u've been brought apart for a different journey than others?

I do.

Be it thru my life. I feel different.

I.E..

I got into the 'gifted' program aged 9++.. I didn't like the additional responsibility and the term, GIFTED. scary. So I stayed where I was, normal school. Flunk PSLE too..haha

Sec 1, I suddenly felt different. THE concerns of others became so childish to me etc. I became closer to only 4 friends. 4..

Got into national youth training squad, broke my back. Never returned.

Found someone special. 5 wonderful growing years. Now, I'm so afraid of becoming a past of her tat she'll hide from everyone. I may never get a chance to be with her again, becoz....she has issues whenever she thinks of me.
Our journey itself was special. How I wish, tat she would allow us to have a chance to show the testmony of God's love for us, thru us...with us...like the very first time we were in love with Christ.

Became diagnoise with some 1 in 2million illness..of the back n spine. I have better odds than 4D ! .. But God allows it to happen, to keep me rooted to him. to be humble.
............................ Just before I could say LIFE IS UNFAIR TO ME,

I'm reminded...tat I should not be too comfortable on this earth.

Yes, I wanna be healed. I wanna teach my kid to play the sport of my family..
I want her to be happy...n give me reasons to believe in LOVE again.
and thru it all..I know he's with me.

Comfort and company is so precious to me...tat once I tasted it, I feel so terrible when its ripped away from me. Doesn't help, I can be picky...
But life here isn't comfort...
--------------------------------
I love hospitals.. They give me such comfort. I've been there as a customer many times over. Yes...I've been on the bed..and I've also been on the other side. Each time, is a new experience.
The feelings there is always special.
There's only one hospital in S'pore..tat fills my heart with sorrow. Someone left me behind there. I wasn't able to mourn for her. I do so. So every often..becoz..she's a part of me tat could have happen but never did.
I hope to be able to pick her out in heaven. She would be so much like family.
God bless her.

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